i'm sick of taking my pants off and seeing a look of disappointment on the girls face. i want her to be frigthened
I seriously can't date anymore I forgot how to hide my crazy
Only in Alabama do they play hymns in a bar!!!
its not stalking. its research.
Ew, dude I just walked in on my boss masturbating in the supply room at the restaurant. He didn't see me so I quickly shut the door and pretended like it didn't happen. And then literally five minutes later he came up to me and cupped my face with his hands and told me what a great employee I was. I got a promotion but I'm fucking scarred for life. I can't stop cringing.
you knoww youre high when you are just as concerned as the contestants on ultimate cake off as they move their 250 lbs cake over the ramp
kinda considering buying a life alert for sophmore year
sometimes you have to go after what you want
true. and i really want to cum
I'm hiding her cosmo magazine. the only sex tip she needs is to not handcuff her boyfriend to her roommates bed and lose the key
Someone want to explain the bottle of ranch I found in my pants
Let's go dancing. I wanna sprain an ankle. And a labia. My labia or yours. I'm not picky.
Shoot me. Oh my god shoot me. My moms ex "likes assholes"
Dude my pants were only on for 20 minutes after she got there.
That's 30 minutes too many.
He adjusted my bra straps while I blew him.
Dude there's ten thousand dollars worth of damage to the kids house and three thousand in stolen property and his dog is missing he is pissed
If I give him back his dog do you think he'll invite me to the next party
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