So...we accidentally left a bag of puke in your sister's room. Heads up.
the young, male pastor of my church has a jesus fish tramp-stamp. I made him show me.
shouldn't i get a discount if shes pregnant?
I put my bosses number in my phone as "Do not call," I shouldve known my drunk curiosity would overcome any desire I had to keep my job.
again?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i came on her dog
Soup is not an acceptable meal before doing that many Jager bombs
I hid a girl's boot last night so I could ransom it back this morning via the "blowjobs for boots" program.
When I blacked in, I was crying to my father at the swim-up bar that "I was going to win an Oscar." how do you THINK Mexico was?
So who won the naked front yard Olympics last night?
Well my tits are spray painted gold & i have what i think r the Olympic rings shaved in my vag !!!!!!!SO its safe to say i won something ....
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was passed out in a bathroom stall. Of course im going to look like shit
SOME BITCH AT THE HOSTEL STOLE MY NUT BUTTER THERE WILL BE BLOOD
I thought my sex drive was gone but let me tell you it is back with a vengeance
He was really cute! And I know but it's just like getting my fix ya know? He's basically a human vibrator.
Just found a rebirth in peppermint schnapps. May be able to stay up all night and finish this paper after all. MERRY CHRISTMAS
You turned down sex for fried cheese??
My penis and doctor won't be happy with me, but come on. Fried cheese!
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