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ok, stay where you are, be there soon
All these guys look like the American Apparel version of Jesus...
just had amazing sex with a girl I got caught with in second grade playing doctor. her examination is finallllly over
I felt like a fire hydrant the vomit just kept coming out
i'm moving back early just in case the freshmen need a tour of the school
oh right the one that ends on your bed
I fell asleep to the sounds of them banging in the next room. It was oddly soothing...
I don't care what anyone says I want strippers at my funeral.
His mom always writes on my facebook right after we have sex. it's like she knows. with her scary mom psychic powers
The assistant vp has a bottle of wine on his desk & I have a feeling my boobs will be making an appearance today.
Do you know how hard it is to maintain a conversation with someone who just told you they put their cat in the fridge on purpose?
New low. I just threw up in the shower at 4pm. Nothing like leaving behind my 20s with class.
But in today's society it's frowned upon not to wear pants in public.
My ladyscape is the envy of many and the shangrila of few. I will display it proudly.
look for me at the Giants game I will possibly be the drunk girl passed out by 2nd
If you had been home 20 minutes ago, you probably would've caught me masturbating, so it might be for the best.
You have such a talent for this
Friendship, or finding weed?
Yes
Randomize
