You can't hide fat with big sunglasses.
i cant talk right now. we are trying to finish our homework so we can play with play-doh
there is way too much butter on my body for this to be okay
fuck. I just remembered I agreed to let you finger me last night for solely for "scientific purposes"
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I tried to take a photo for proof but couldn't hold my penis, camera, and measuring tape all at the same time.
He likes bondage and spanking and shit.
Oh, so "normal" kinky not "I wanna pee on people" kinky. I can handle that.
Our lady landlord called. Dot worry, I handled it. Drunk. Tell her it was Nate. Done. Good. Bye. Drunk.
The strip clubs here are like a safari of penis, and I'm gonna bag me a rhino.
When / where did the additional couches appear?
Additional?
James brought one with him when he showed up. Theres still 2 outside and according to facebook, at least one more burned up.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have a theory that years from now they will be with women who despise me because of what I trained their husbands to like.
Two big black bouncers picked you up and escorted you to the elevator.
I didn't even do anything wrong. For all they knew I could have been on the US Olympic Gymnastic team. Would they kick Gabby Douglas out of a bar? I don't think so.
Literally too hungover to pull out of the driveway. Tried 3 times and failed. I'm going back to bed.
This morning when you were fucking me you said you'd go to the store and get me tampons and a 30 pack
he's like crack. I can't be in the same room with him while drunk and not do him.
Thinking and hoping ice cream is the answer to my problems
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