i should go to a nude beach and wear just a condom, then ill have tan lines on my dick
is it bad that the first thing i do when i get downstairs is go on farm town?
He just spent five minutes trying to sling shot a cheese-it off his dick and into my mouth.
Highlight of my evening, pile of books falling onto me in front of people
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just googled "who won the civil war" . how can i still have a 97% in this class?
He was drunk at Denny's at 5 am saying how Dear John was the worst movie he has ever seen... eyes filled with tears.
Reggie can tackle my bush.
I just threw up in a patch of wild flowers on the side of the road. I never knew rock bottom was so beautiful.
Why am I a bad person? You were the one trying to get people to eat tape.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hey everyone. This evenings celebration will commence with a cocktail hour at genghis at 830 to be followed with an upscale dining experience at taco bell at 10. All are welcome. This is not a joke. Thank you
The vagina on Hilton Head is mighty fine this time of year.
It's not that I'm in love with her, so much as I would love to be her lesbian experience.
I climaxed at the same time the bass dropped. I think it's safe to say I've reached enlightenment
So it turns out "let's pretend to be gay so guys will stop hitting on us" was step one in her plan to get me into bed...
Love waking up to a new contact named “Pizza” btw
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