6:33 AM: I'm drunk at this time of morning.
Ok let's jusst not talk today bc then we'll just do dangerous things but I'll say hello
i think the date started going downhill when i mentioned how many therapists i have
Dude...disintegrating condoms. Think about it. For all the guys that wanna go raw dog but their girls won't let them, and for the girls that wanna get pregnant but their guys don't want a kid. What do you think?
I think you've been hitting the soco too hard again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She is chewing on staples and spitting them at her cat, I think it's time to leave..
going to class with no bra.. is that saying "i don't give a fuck i'm one hour away from thanksgiving break?"
Just saw a woman with a Pomeranian in her bra. Way to step up your game Seattle.
They left me stranded on the side of the road with a table and five gallons of water. They said it was all I really needed to survive. People are staring
I think I need to donate blood to see if I have Hepatitis. Again.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I lull them into a false sense of security with my gayness. Then when they're vulnerable, I strike, like a snake. A big non-gay snake, with huge balls.
That moment when you can't decide if you should vote for the random frat guy you have head to at the beginning of the semester for business and technology senator.
You told us that you were going to become a 'new man' and threw your tv set out of a window.
If the world ends and i have no vodka please just kill me.
Haha holy fuck. i dont remember much after pissing on your ex's flaming nude pics.
He talked me out going to the bar. No one ever talks me out going to the bar..this is fucking love.
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