You hurt me so bad and it feels so good
what happens if a cat eats a birth control pill? i mean i don't care about the cat i really just don't want to get pregnant
the last thing i remember saying is "hope you like body hair"
he built a boat made of joints. holyyy shit
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You showed up at my apartment after 3 am wasted with a plate of cookies and tried to hook up.
Sorry about that. Except for the cookies.
just mapquested my walk of shame from saturday..bye bye freshman 15
well shes beginning to earn a reputation as "the girl who tries to bone her hook ups in the ass with a pickle"
Sorry there's no emoticon for I got my period all over a guy's bed so I had to improvise. There isn't even a bed one
The only thing I'm asking santa for is my period.
And vodka?
And vodka.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I no longer exist. I have transformed into a puddle of sex.
I have three different pairs of earrings at three different houses including your 16 year old brothers nightstand. Look at my life. Look at my choices
After this week, alcohol is mandatory.
I feel like a weird modern Betty Crocker. I'm icing a cake and looking at gay porn, if that's not an accurate portrayal of the 21st century idk what is.
All I know is I woke up cuddling a jar of peanut butter....
Just threw up in a baggy on the airplane. The guys next to me clapped and bought me a jack and coke.
Livin the dream
Randomize