Oh yes. The girl who wanted me to watch her pee.
It was then that he suggested we all nibble ears. A nibble circle.
i drank out of a bidet.
I just found what appears to be a tooth in my purse...anybody missing one?
I feel like someone had their period in my eyes.
I'm sorry I got a little outta control last night.
Hey, it was your idea to keep her occupied with the barscanner on your phone.
you didnt need to give her a fucking sharpie. there are handmade barcodes everywhere. including my cock. fucker.
What time do you think you'll be heterosexual?
We don't really communicate like that.
Communicate like what?
Communicate like people who want to see each other when their genitals are inside their pants.
Fairly certain I cracked a rib. Masturbation is not for the weak. I die now.
Also one of my neighbors is blasting "pumped up kicks" and possibly butchering some chickens
i still can't believe he got laid by going to the bar and handing out "cuddle buddy" application forms
You meet the best people naked in a hot tub at 2 am.
woke up to find i out made out with his roommate before hooking up with him. breakfast was awkward to say the least
I think I've been there, but who knows? I drink a lot
All I remember is you shouting "THIS KID IS A FREAKIN' NINJA!!" when he dive rolled over a barbed wire fence and proceeded to ask for his 18th beer.
Randomize
