I am not sure how to feel about the fact that I was turned on by someone with a penis. I can't believe Lady Gaga would do this to me. :(
I just want to jump into a ballpool of dicks now.
I decided that Calgary can keep my underwear. They earned it.
Dude, just be careful. Her invitation for BJ is just a trap for her to stick her finger up your ass.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dear female. Happy valentines day. If you have not had the pleasure of making love to me, please do not fret, I will get around to it soon enough. If you indeed have made love to me, then bravo, wasn't that grand! Perhaps we should do it again? Regardless, have a good day. This has been a public service announcement. Rock on.
I'll be so proud. Like a proud mama bear freeing my slut cub into the wild.
Come through the front door when you get here.
Right now I'm so wasted I can't determine whats a door and a window.
My Wonder Woman lingerie has been defiled by man. I'm a horrible Amazon.
My liver appreciates your vow of avoiding matrimony
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
but if we have a President Trump come Tuesday, I might throw myself off the Walt Whitman Bridge so Thursday might not work for me after all.
He'd never survive you. Is there a boot camp for pre-heather training?
I can't tell if my need for dick is more than my want to strangle him
So bottomless mimosas = me waking up in a truck bed in a random neighborhood with no purse or phone or idea how I got there.
I wasnt 2 drunk i sobered up around the time we were shooting the fire extinguishers
Our baby is creepy.
That's how we know it's ours. haha
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