So I'm banging this nun...
Isn't that how all good stories start? I like it already...
I've decided to sign up for a porn membership, but it's 10:30 and I'm going to wait an hour an a half because I don't want to waste a whole day of my month long membership. Fuck this economy.
just brushed my teeth with a bottle of jack. ew. not all it's hyped up to be.
I didn't mind getting the stomach flu from him. we had great sex AND I'm seven pounds lighter
This is the last weekend of getting drunk and having sex all nite with the plumber. I'm exhausted all weekend and I'm never going to finish the remodel at this rate
I think I'm coming down now. I almost started crying because I lost a piece of paper.
My vagina and my morals are playing tug of war
I have bruises everywhere. I think I took "the drinks are strong" as more of a challenge than a warning.
THERE IS A GOAT THERE IS A GOAT IN MY BED IT IS EATING MY THONG WHAT DID YOU DO
Don't get me wrong, I love talking about lube and such, but why are we?
There's a bus with a band full of dancing women in bras. I think I like it here.
Aint no party like a Broke College Girls Eating Stuffed Crust Pizza party
is telling someone you can be his trophy wife the same as proposing?
I want you inside me. Finish your papers.
I think I'm the first girl to break a bed with a guy, without even having sex with him while doing so.
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