Is it normal to miss your booty call?
I think that we as people have rights and that we should at the very least be warned before being subjected to Fergie
I just found a hunk of ham in my back jeans pocket from god knows when. We gotta stop going so ham.
I keep confusing the name of her and her dog. Both are appropriate.
So the name of the kid from the sponsor a child comercial popped into my head while I was masturbating this morning. Needless to say I will now be now be donating out of guilt.
Reunion weekend was a success. Had 3 ex's inside my vag. Hat trick!
Shirtless guy staggering down the sidewalk, puking into a Prada shopping bag. Ahhh, the walk of shame in Boystown.
We had sex during an intermission, then the second period. The bruins better win. Missing a period isn't worth having sex with him
I'm going back to his house to watch wreck it Ralp.
Hey, Monsters Inc. got me laid. Disney man, who knew it leads to sex.
I don't think you understand...I'm really good at getting drunk
I walked in on him pumping himself up by headbanging to the drumbeat from Jumanji.
I need to get all the one night tinders in my system before I move back in with my parents
Even with help how did you paint a bullseye around your asshole?
like I'd leave you in a situation like that..pfft. what kinda friend do you think I am?
...a stoned one.
On a scale of 1 to i should hide, how deep did i dig my grave?
Randomize
