It's 8:30am and I'm drinking.... this is a new low
Admittedly I was a little ambitious with some of the positions but you walked in during the worst of it.
We had sex in his tahoe, talked about how we don't love each other and then high fived twice. Best Day Ever
i have to go see a new gyno today. he's a male. i just took 3 shots of tequila. its almost like freshman year... drink alcohol, meet a strange man, let him play with my vagina.
Someone will be leaving this trip either pregnant or devastated.
hes so high that he's convinced hes a duck. hes squating in the bathtub quacking. that was NOT JUST pot.
Jon thought he was that blonde chick from Three's Company when he was shrooming
you know you made out with my sister while holding Ur girlfriends hand while she was puking in the toilet right
when was she peeing in the stairwell? why dont i remember this?
....because generally we only remember 40% of the night each, and have to fill eachother in. And that still leaves 20% that we will never know and its probably for the best
Please. I don't care how shitty his fake life story was. As horny as I was I just wanted the prettiest man possible in case I accidentally got pregnant. He had blue eyes.
Ya I know. She's self aware though, like the terminator. Which is the best kind of crazy
No more margaritas for you. Also, tequila should be reclassified as a hallucinogen.
For breaking and entering. I think neighbor dan cared more about me puking in his backseat than the surprise of me waking up there
I could tell you were slightly drunk by the time you started having a conversation with my tiki torch
Quit being awkward towards me every time the group is together. They're going to figure out we're fucking.
Randomize
