I just did your MASH and your life is pretty unfortunate. Youre marrying the tech guy for love. you live in a shack and you're a hooker and you make $1 a day. you drive a brown limo and you have 7 kids
I need you to promise me that the first one to find out our kids smoke weed, takes the weed so we can smoke it ourselves
So I decided to put different foods on my dick to see which would feel the best
and??
Cake is only good when you eat it
I lost of the blow last night. Found it later in my bag labeled Fairy Dust.
Im so ripped right now that i just filled the almost empty bottle of choc syrup with milk and drank it straight out of the bottle. It was on pointttttt.
Dude you make losing your phone an art. You left it balancing on a two liter bottle in the kitchen. Wtf
i thought i'd fucked her to death. no lie. she just stopped moving.
you kept thanking chef boyardee for having pull tab cans
I WANT MY VAGINA TO POUND AT NICE THINGS.
I'm having a hard time existing right now. When I figure out how it works ill be over.
You declared that afternoon sex will be referred to as "wet naps" from now on
i think she learned that just cuz half shots were easier, doesnt mean she can have triple as many.
Only I would get an underage 24 hours before turning 21.
I like how I can go from sucking dick in the my basement to singing along to veggie tales with my family in a span of 10 minutes.
Alex thinks he can revoke my dick privileges haha.
Isn't he the one getting all the privileges ?
Randomize