I know she is the girl of my dreams bc she orgasmed, rolled over and then asked if I knew that Orlando beat Cleveland.
I found my old addy guy via fb who clearly understands the supply and demand curve of addy during finals so he's gonna hook me up.
i dont even know how to be here
Alcoholism comes in two forms... Us.
i'm sitting in the second floor bathroom drinking coronas in the shower. do not find me.
Nothing like a $37 iTunes bill. Jesus Christ do you know how many $2 beer/shot specials that is??? The answer is 16. 16 beer/shot specials.
The bartender cut me off so I peed in the corner. How no one noticed I have no idea.
Drinking games this Saturday as usual although the ice cube tray game is banned due to last weeks incident
I thought it was a drawer and tried to pull it out and it wasnt a drawer it was the police call button. I hate everything.
It's because of weed that I don't mind driving an hour to visit my family. And it's because of you that there's weed in my life. Thank you.
4 days in college, 3 frat parties. I haven't been this drunk since the unspeakable Jäger bomb incident in Sweden.
I actually had to tell him that sex doesn't replace my Tupperware. Our relationship has reached a weird level.
He was on top and as he finished he yelled "I love gold" , so yeah I'm seeing him later tonight
Walk of shaming into my apartment. No one to clap me in. Come home!
I'll be home soonish I need 4th of July sex, it's the American thing to do.
Randomize
