The more I sober up, the more sick I am/realize how weird dancing around a wine bottle was
Just took a beer bong out of snuffaluffagus's trunk. Your move
Okay, thats embarrasing even by my standards and I've thrown up while wearing a viking hat. just a viking hat.
He waited exactly 18 minutes to booty call me after his break up.
These 33 Eskimo Brothers Boinked The Same Person And Couldn’t Be More Proud
Rode my bike to work still drunk. Almost threw up on a camper while getting him out of his parents car.
Is putting "Tonight I'm Fucking You" on my date playlist too forward?
I'm just going to say , cocktail races are not for a Wednesday night maybe not even a Friday type of deal
Walk of shaming dressed as a zombie hunter. This hangover feels like the actual apocalypse.
SEXX, SEXX, SEXX,SEXX,SEX SEX SEXXXXXXX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEXSEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEX.\nimagine that to the can can song. also come to my house. theres a dance routine.
17 Inappropriate Things People Did With Instruments
If they weren't representing Obama and the White House, they definitely would've punched me in the face.
Ive done some fucked up shit, but last night was the first I have Poured milk on anothers mans face in the shower.
I just hope I don't wheeze during sex
In my opinion the party was fun, but i did A LOT of cocaine so my view was a little distorted......
She's officially a Tinder poltergeist.
When Dad gets to your house, ask him about the sound of anal beads. Happy Thanksgiving!