Can i come over
After you called me a desperate slut? No
Come over
Should I tell Kevin that my finger was in his sister's ass last night?
It was then that he suggested we all nibble ears. A nibble circle.
I basically get to watch her life fall apart via tumblr updates
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Freedom, beauty, truth, and love to all. I also probably have syphilis
No, I left myself a half eaten cucumber and a beer next to my head, pointed at it and said 'you're breakfast' and then passed out.
i was beyond wasted so he tucked me into bed and wrapped the blankets around me like a burrito. then gave me a bloody mary and an omlet when i woke up. and who says living with your cousin is a bad thing?!
I'm dressed like a deranged cupcake. Let's get fucked up.
I caved man... I fucked her so vigorously, desperately trying to correct her wonky eye. My determination was relentless.
You are a terrible person.
I just try to be optimistic...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I apologize for being mean. I love the blender and your vagina.
He said "just hugs" and ran away screaming.
So it may have been laced, sue me.
I felt like... 50% confused and 50% like a slow roasted flip flop.
I guess I just don't understand how the two main issues with your ex involve a cock ring and a Christmas tree
If I ever drink whiskey again make sure I don't eat the plastic cups that I'm drinking them from.
Do toy wanna orseer frim onedof tjose plaves? Sry textimg with globes on
Gloves*
Out of all the words to correct, you chose gloves??
Randomize