Beverly Hills, 90210. Cleveland Browns, 0.
hell no. last time, i couldn't pee straight for a week.
Drunkenly auctioned off my bed for 3 tequila shots
trying to imitate man vs food after 12 shots doesnt mean youll get laid
.....woke up with a tube of cinnamon buns in my pocket, i miss you
I know, but I was really high and I felt like a failure dragon because I could only blow smoke, no fire.
Thats gotta be it. Also just found out that the fireworks will fit in the airsoft pistols...we are all gonna die
Faking my way through an entire party as a British exchange student. Wish me luck.
You threw up in a empty pizza box at Pizza Hut and opened the door with your face. So that maybe why it's bruised.
It's a lube slip n slide down the hallway now. Details later.
At one point I was convinced he was a snake and was going to eat me And I just accepted it
Dude, you can't drink while watching Star Trek. You hardly understand it sober.
It's an alien shaped cup though. i think that'll help me absorb.
I pack a first-aid kit when I DD for you. What does that tell you about your partying? For what I see and do, paying my food and gas for the night is a goddamn BARGAIN.
Just because you are home alone for the weekend doesn't mean you can act like a nudist.
I accept your opinion but respectfully disagree. Also, I'm sitting in your chair.
I wanted to write an apology letter to my vagina after that.
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