how can you tell if its a queef or a fart from that close?
It was like if Side-show Bob had a vagina for a mouth
I discovered the grieving process is shock, denial, anger...and then something about drinking until you puke on yourself
While at warped tour today a girl was crowd surfing and her vagina landed in my face, I call that a successfull day.
Yes, that was me on the jumbo tron. No, i don't know why i was hiding.
I realize now that I left my pants on that table in the downstairs bathroom at you house on Tuesday....
I just Tebowed the shit out of her.
Nice and you can't use "Tebow" in the place of every verb.
You fucked her?! HER?!
She sent me a nudie pic with a bunch of weed nuggets all over her tits...what was I supposed to do? I don't hate America sir.
Currently smoking a blunt with my one night stand's mom. I don't know how I should feel about this.
i just want to attach a dildo to the ceiling and ride it like a gay spiderman.
He's a prodigy! It would be a service to the scientific community.
15 is 15
Going to the ER, I'll explain later but apparently drunk me isn't allergic to peanut butter.
Is there a polite/non-lush way to ask how alcohol ranks on their list of priorities? Because like idk how to break the ice furreal.
I told my therapist about the other night and he actually whistled and said "wow that is not good."
Eventually I will start sleeping with people who actually want to hangout with me the next day... But not today
Randomize
