she fell down the flight of stairs and was fine until she saw the two broken beer bottles on the ground by her.
thats a woman
standing in the yard with no pants on waiting for google maps to come and take a picture.
I banged her roommate when she was gone. She came back with a chicken sandwich and a bj. Then she said " smells like my roommates vagina" I think I can get a threesome tonight
make sure nobody uses the downstairs toilet. i like to have an unused toilet for the weekends. dont shit where you puke i always say.
Just watered mom's plants with leftover mixed drinks full of Bacardi Silver. I'm such a good daughter.
He is into some weird shit i walked in his room last night he was waving his hard dick around hitting shit yellin cock fight
He had a joint rolled for us when he picked me up. It's how ASU does romance
People were running around punching out the ceiling tiles Super Mario style.
i had a tequila and emotion induced one night stand with a random stranger. senior year: infinity me: 0.
My roommates don't agree with the whole tv in the bathroom idea. Fucking barbarians.
I put his pb&j sandwich in my bra and never looked back
That last one reminds me of the time we smoked that foot-long joint and by the time we'd finished we were so stoned we applauded it.
I just slept for fifteen hours straight. It's like my body knows i'm drinking with you and is preparing..
Convinced if I was being murdered in my house no one would come and save me. If no one heard my 10000000 orgasms last night, there is no hope.
Haha word. Sure I can do that. Help me find which bar has my pants and you'll get free tacos all week
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