Its about making memories worth repressing
I got drunk and threw up on a kid at the amusement park. I think they're pressing charges.
plan parent hood is for high school, im at the abortion clinic, so college.
I'm so high I just tried to eat a hair tie thinking it was one of my pretzels.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Im sitting next to shitfaced santa at the cuse game. My plan to be on television is now flawless
today is like waiting for pizza day in elementary school, but with sex added
I think thats the most anyones ever pregamed for rollerskating
imagine how many guys you'd have sex if you didn't recieve your monthly gift.
Im in your car brotha dog. Its was unlocked, so im gonna sleep in it. well i mean i think its your car be your car.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We were eating hotdog buns dipped in French onion dip in lawn chairs at 4am. That drunk
Se wrote an essay in class about proper and fashionable winter wear for dogs. Of course I regret fucking her.
This girl I interned with got engaged today and I'm just like over here taking plan B with my tacos and PBR.
I just put on underwear fresh outta the dryer and it's like tiny Angels are giving them warm supportive hugs all over
How is it that I can make it to my 8am Friday morning still drunk after passing out the night before...but not to my 9am on Tuesday that I went to bed early for? Irony or karma?
I woke up with what has to be a whole pack of smarties loose in my bra. Was that your fault?
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