I'm too stoned for this. I'm Canadian.
Tell me exactly where it said it wasn't a unisex bathroom.
is her vagina suppost to smell like dirty taco bell?
She's clinging to me like a horny koala.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm so sorry man. Roger cartwheeled into a signpost and cut his face open. it was pretty messy so we all went into panic mode.
your bra might or might not be a decoration on me and my roomies xmas tree haha
He passed out again after sex. I've hidden all his clothes. There's no way he is sneaking out in the morning this time!
And you will no longer be getting a thank you note from my vagina
I awoke this morning alone and naked in my bed I forecast my date later not going so well because I have three giant hickies on my neck there is a note next to my bed that looks a 3rd grader wrote it on my college acceptance letter
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
sex on the stairs. not our finest idea.
Okay so, sorry but last night we had to put a note on your chest and a key around your neck just so you would make it home.
As Scar once said. Be prepared! For the shit show of what's coming tonight
I'll bring your "congrats on finally banging" cookies tomorrow, I'm exhausted.
So apparently I tried texting you last night to tell you I wasn't coming home, but all I had typed were lyrics from Evita
I think it's a bit on the nose for the Uber driver to play stairway to heaven while driving like A psycho.
Randomize