I just hope my dad was drunk enough to not remember the whole convo we had about anal.
I wonder why dictionaries dont have indexes to help find the words easier.
whispering "taste the rainbow" well having sex isn't my biggest turn on.
Drunkenly auctioned off my bed for 3 tequila shots
the arrest was probably divine intervention, cause i think we were heading to an ill-advised threesome.
He told me I handled myself pretty well considering how drunk I was. He failed to realize that the lollipop I had was one I found on the ground a few minutes before hand.
You grabbed her hand and started jacking her finger off. She was horrified.
Did it finish?
Too lazy to make dinner. Had chocolate and scotch instead. Check in with me in a half hour.
I'm pretty sure that I drunkenly used the phrase "I just want his beard all over my body" way too many times last night.
Well I'm going to hell. But I'm going after multiple orgasms.
I am not a slut. I'm just very open with how much I love to have sex. Stop judging.
Mom told me you snuck booze into a concert in a cheez its box...I have never been prouder to be related to you
the puppy had a little leather gag and was using a ball gag as a fetch toy
I hope every time you eat hashbrowns you think about me, the awesome sex we had and how great we could have been.
You're so sweet in the most vulgar ways
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