i wanted to be an indian when i was a child. apparently you cannot grow up to be an indian.
so my dad walked in on us having sex
lulz really? why?
lets just say he wont be answering to 'daddy' for a loooooong time
His dick was poking my bladder. That big...
Had to make a piece of abstract art. Your dick is in it
he doesn't drink and he's an emt - he'll be our dd for nye in exchange for a threesome tomorrow afternoon.
We just filmed our own version of iron chef. The secret ingreient was whisky.
What did you cook with whisky?
We started a fire.
do you have any idea how hard it is to keep a boner while another dude is writing on your dick in sharpie?
You have to keep an eye on her tonight cause you know how she likes to pickpocket people when she's drunk.
I just started talking about my sextoy because I wanted things to be normal again.
Oh god I want to come home! They have an air raid siren here that alerts their neighbours across the desert it's time to come over on atvs and drink.
So far I've taken two naps, went out and bought a pizza called the Hipster, and in 15 min I'm gonna make a snow angel. Conquering Snowlandia. How bout you?
hi I'm Emily and I thoroughly enjoy getting minors hammered.. I'll start my AA intro just like that.
Operation: 12 Dick pics of Christmas was a sweeping success, thanks for asking!
Stories. There's stories.
MEGHAN YOU'VE BEEN THERE FOR 20 MINUTES
She came into the salon and said, "Don't judge me. Yes that's cum in my hair and I want a shampoo, cut and style."
Randomize
