...seriously? chocolate pudding? motorboating? No one has even done that to ME and i am 69 times the whore you are
girl in front of me at starbucks just ordered 7 shots of espresso in her latte. welcome to finals week
So, Southern Comfort will donate 25 cents for every bottle sold towards Gulf Coast Relief... Can we save the wetlands through my alcoholism?
he's werid. hell kiss me after i go down on him but he wont kiss me after i eat anything with mustard.
they pretty much knew i was there to get drunk and fuck their daughter
I lost my grandmas ring. Probably during the handjob.
If it's not soft enough to fuck on, then we're not getting the new rug.
Are we really going to sext in Pokemon battle fashion?
I am about to embark upon a south Boston wedding....
Hydrate.
Not good... He ate my chips. Thats not a sex analogy for anything. My actual potato chips... gone. I lost on both ends.
"Just cut me in half. Then take half of me home. And leave the other half here. Cuz I can't see."
I know it sounds all cute and shit that I wanted him to be with me last night, but it's not cute. I just wanted to fuck.
You do it and I'll burn these mermaid pants so help me God.
I just want you to know that i deffinately saw the baby clothes, and didn't freak out and still had sex with him. I'm going to hell.
I'm gonna go take a shower so I can cleanly change into my drinking underwear.
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