I just hatefucked a Bush administration appointee. Now having celebratory mimosas.
I tried watching the view, i got through 8 minutes. That is probably a world record.
They always sound like a bunch of chickens.
dude that girl has seen more cock ends then weekends
I just drank Colt45 out of a champagne glass. I feel classy.
Colt 45 out of anything is classy.
When he came he sounded like a flock of birds hitting puberty
i would have smoked before this dance, how ever i have surgery Monday and I looked up weed and anesthesia and fatalities was mentioned, so i decided that it would be a bad idea
probs a good idea
i like the whole idea of life and being alive
you sure you're not high?
Dude pussy is like music. For every person who pays for it, there are thousands more getting it for free.
he sounded really stupid. it was like his puke had a stutter, too.
I can honestly say I've never had orange soda poured on my vagina before, that's a story for the grand kids
I'm pretty sure that when my parents bought me those savings bonds they thought it would go towards something useful like tuition. Not your bail.
I told you I'd buy you lunch.
Was that your vagina? Received a text pic from a number I didn't recognize. Shaved, so no hair color cues. But it looked like your lips.
Tell me again why I left before the topless cake fight
Holy shit I've found my last one night stand in my Gran's knitting club
'valentine' just autocorrected to 'cake robe' in my phone
I think that summarizes my life up pretty accurately
Btw that $18 I gave you to run around outside naked came out of your wallet.
Randomize
