I haven't had sex in so long I'll probably find some stranger, feel guilty, go w/o sex for several months and do it all over again...always something to look forward to
he rolled over and started playing skeeball on his iphone after we had the best sex yet considering he only lasted 10 seconds last time.. im getting standards.. tomorrow. for now im just going to enjoy the fact i counted over 20 this time.
I'm in a subway station watching a tranny do her makeup. This is like watching a unicorn giving birth.
We just walked into this party and immediately got handed a grilled cheese sandwhich....
I mean I'm basically single. Or maybe just an asshole. Either way.
I found the other part of your tooth if you want to put it under your pillow
yeah, and when i walked in on them fucking he said "go away, i'm making sons."
Its against the rules to not make you aware of his virgin situation prior to penetration
no dude I'm not doing anything bad to her...remember she's always the DD she has blackmail material on literally all of us
My going away gift was all of them dancing around with solo cups on their dick and balls...these are my friends
$645 later, she's throwing up in my washroom and asking for a cab. Hooker are soooo much cheaper.
Everyone loves nachos, first of all. Second, Ke$ha is entirely appropriate for the age grou too young to realize she probably has Hep C.
Hungover playing piano at a baptism I am the PICTURE of class I feel like I should be struck by lightning
I was gonna respond but i couldnt figure out a way to rearrange 'fuck his brains out' to sound grammatically correct
YOU SHOULD HAVE BEEN THE FIRST VISITOR TO CHRISTMASLAND