In retrospect, it was a terrible idea, going down on her with these ulcers in my mouth.
Working out to an exercise video on OnDemand. Also, drinking beer and eating cream cheese with a side of bagel in between stretches.
You sucked the drug dealers dick for a 20 of coke...?
Nooo, I payed for that. I sucked his dick because I had an urge.
im gonna make a bucket list just so i can cross off "underwater blowjob"
He just told me that he goes squirrel hunting. NO LONGER BANGABLE.
Fact: Chilis at the airport in JAX will serve you shots of jack at 6:45 with breakfast. Ya I missed my flight.
So when does your new flight leave?
At my shot/hour ratio.... I leave in 16 shots. I love flying
Not sure if you carved a butthole or vagina in that pumpkin but that didn't stop high Phil from mounting. My study group is horrified.
Currently cooking 3lbs of bacon in case the power goes out bc if even one slice of bacon goes to waste then sandy wins
It's like God tapped him on the shoulder and said "You are now capable of giving world shattering, tear jerking head."
My mind just played a snippet of me asking to be a Joey and trying to climb into your apron pocket...
He woke up & asked where his pants were then asked where he was then asked who I was. Been married 20 yrs. He was drunkest ever.
I made a nest in his bed. I'm not leaving
Just got my LSAT score...if you need me I'll be drunk in a ditch somewhere.
It was pretty awesome. I drank out of a stein and attempted to dance to dubstep with some older guys in leiderhosen.
Dude just saw some some guy puke out of a car window on the highway going to school.
Randomize
