The only good thing about ohio is that i can get 2 half gallons of soco for 40 bucks
Drank beer out of a hotwheels bucket all night
hey boys, thanks for all the pictures of your dick you took with my camera last night...they were really nice to stumble upon while reliving my night in the breakroom today at work
11am puke and rally. THIS is what I'm gonna miss about college.
luckily my workout playlist doubles as a masturbation playlist.
Let me refresh your memory. New Year's Eve in the back of my car you grabbed my hand and said feel my tumor on my butthole and at that moment I swear we were infinite
I've figured out why I love winter sex. Because I make them leave the beanie on, and we all know I love a man in a beanie.
Topenga is going to be back on TV. Finally my fantasy of her being a milf in junior high has come full circle.
Dude I thought she was trying to turn my dick inside out
no one ever believes me when I try explaining to them that your straight. I'm all like, "yeah that's his girlfriends dress he's stretching out"
I just really hate taking care of things... If I can't fill it with liquor I'm not sure what to do with it.
I have work in an hour and I'm having trouble with concepts such as 'staying upright' and 'staying conscious'. Tie me to your wrist next time we go out drinking,
Well I shit myself on the way home from work today so there's that...
I'll do whatever I want when I'm 80.
If you are still alive at 80 I demand a medical explanation.
He put a doughnut around his dick and I ate it. What can I say. It was a good fucking night.
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