This is awkward. You have a four minute voicemail from me. I would delete it. I accidently hit your number on speed dial and called you while I was vomiting a mai tai.
I think we should see other people.
Already working on it.
They found an open window, climbed through and proceeded to arrest half the party. These campus cops are like fucking ninjas.
let me put this in terms we both understand. he was the crunchwrap supreme of men--the perfect combo of all things manly, gooey and delicious. and ready for instant enjoyment.
I can't think of anything besides pubic hair fallout. Ugh.
I paid your cover too so you're on the list as tits mcgee. You're welcome :D
I am ina trunk. Iam in a trunnnnnjkk. I hope its yours. Oh manomanomano. Thids better be your trunk
Not sure if it is a new high or new low, but i left a basket on the porch of the sorority I woke up at. It had a description of the Minnie Mouse I woke up next to, and Plan B.
I need a costume
Dude just wear a bra or something hahaha
Brought some lesbians back to the light side of the force
We got drunk, we had raw sex and we discussed about the showrunner change in Doctor Who, in that order.
I'm now forever going to blame miss frizzle for making me the sexual deviant that I am today
The air tonight was full of shame when we saw each other.
Well if u wouldn't have had sex on the front porch last night I think that could have been avoided.
i forgot how loud opening a beer is in a house where your not allowed to drink
I was singing Colors of the Wind and swigging vodka and still felt like more of an adult.
Randomize
