Also, the republican called me again last night. He called me dumb and ugly then begged to come over. Gosh... he knows how to make me want him...
so my mom told me to suck on something if I have to cough. so I guess blow jobs are ok
I accidentally requested the ides of march off instead of st patricks day. Is this an omen? will alcohol be my brutus?
You don't even know the meaning of faking an orgasm until you sleep with an uncircumcised ginger.
Complete silence. Background Willy Wonka music. An empty back of Lay's BBQ chips. These are the ingredients for an extreme acid trip.
Just in case you were wondering..... I really did just wave goodbye to you with my penis.
Walt said he was feeding me so I wouldn't die. that's why there was pasta in my room
A reason for us to be drunk all week National Singles Week
HE TRIED TO HIT ME WITH A CHAIR. Stoned video games are NOT happening again
All i remember his him yelling yahtzee while pouring beer down her shirt .
The lady that was sitting beside me thought the best way to cheer herself up was to pet and ruffle my hair while crying and telling me her problems...
I've decided to have sex with him one more time to make sure I don't like him
Roomies told me I showed up to my house alone with no pants on and burrs in my hair... I live in the middle of the city
wyd
Laying here debating on if i want a sandwich or an orgasm.
The people around me on the bus dont know im wearing glowsticks under my clothes. I feel like a super hero.
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