Girls should come with a carfax report
His mom took away his car and made him quit his job.
HE'S 26!!!
I don't see why you're so upset, it's not like you were wearing pants either.
He fell asleep and they duct taped him to the floor. He's pissed.
I don't know what's happening. Everyone is wearing beaks.
I think I'm about to have sex with a second person before noon hehehhe! You're welcome America.
It's taking 3 penises to fill the hole he left in my heart.
I'm gonna cougar town the shit out of that prom.
I took a sleeping pill while he was in the bathroom. Time for a game of how long can we bang before I fall asleep.
You are both horrible and amazing
I woke up naked with a $20 bill taped to my titty, so I must of had fun.
fuck whipped cream. I'd eat vegetables off those abs
Get his dick out of your ass and put on some pants we're here
Thank you for holding my butt in a non-sexual manner when its cold. I appreciate you and your warm hands.
i just drunk stumbled into my home... to figure out that we moved 2 weeks ago..
Let's get this straight. I am six fucking feet tall. Do you even understand how limited my options in guys to date are? No. Did you see my last three boyfriends? I looked like a fucking giant next to them. So I will fuck this six-foot-seven Italian model even if I am the ugliest girl at this party because, goddammit, I deserve to.
Randomize
