My nipple is on Facebook.
I thought it was weird that her dad told me to finish and get out after he walked in on us. I like him
Fuck Jersey, the house im in is so baller but this state just cannot win.
he's my edward cullen
I am pretty sure Edward Cullen never had an all-day drinking binge topped off with some blow.
Is it sad that I'm on the stopduiaz.com website and there is a cute boy but it will never work between us because hes in jail for 17.5 years?
Um.. is it mean if I say yes?
How would my first penpal letter even go? "Hey saw you on stopduiaz.com, sucks you killed that motorcyclist. Whats your favorite thing to do on the weekend?"
You are not answering and I think it is because you spent 80 dollars worth of drinks on you hot cousin.
You told the cops that they couldn't arrest you because they weren't hot enough to fuck
My drug dealer asked me out. What's the protocal for this?
You've got more to offer than just money. Come on. You have an awesome rack.
So to distract myself from jackies vomiting, im making up a story in my head. It's called the little penis that could
We were having an argument with his friends mom about whether it was worse that he bootycalled me at 4 a.m. or that I bootycalled him at 12 in the afternoon
Food poisoning on first date... Still rode the mechanical bull like a champ
Did my married ex-boyfriend really tell me that he prays for me? Fucking Judas
But what if there are 6 people and they end up just pairing the off into 3 couples. Is it still an orgy?
Thought the acid was fake. Then my reflection didn't move when I did in the bathroom.
Randomize
