I love sluts.
I end my prayers with that every single night.
He told me he looked up all the foods that make cum taste better and he put it all on his moms shopping list. she came through my line. this ones a keeper I think.
Ok. Cause im very serious about this. I wanna strip and do coke for a month
we just saw you getting yelled at by the cops for trying to 'hijack' a street sweeper...how have you not been arrested yet?
Yeah I'm gunna date him. I figure its regular sex and maybe feelings will come in time...it worked for arranged marriages...
I figured, if I'm going to wear a gold cape its pretty safe to assume I'll be blacking out as well.
She. Own s my pussycat. Roxk it like. The sun hitting the horizon
Whenever I walk away from the group without saying anything, NEVER assume I'm just going to the bathroom.
I swear to god little potato creatures live inside Belvedere bottles and claw at your throat as you swallow shots.
I would have dumped her already but between the 4 hr bjs and our shared love of enjoying thirsty Thursday naked while watching basketball I'd say its the best shot at love ill ever have
Did you go to church in Texas and sign me up?
You need southern Jesus
There's a kitten on my face and I'm druuuunk
My boobs smell like weed again. This happens way too often.
it was weird going down on him. His picture of Jesus was staring at me the entire time...
I woke up remembering only that I got pulled over by a cop, then looked over and found that same cop, naked.
Randomize
