he wasnt completely random
you're right. you met him once and didnt know his name. you still dont
i get things done.
I thought she had blonde hair
No, Gonorrhea actually
I want to make Jon&Kate babies with him. Not in quantity, but in percentage asian.
You know you love balls. Don't act all "I-Don't-Love-Balls-ish"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I guess she didn't feel like it. There was hair all over it and everything
i'm pretty sure i just ruined some dude's romantic riverside sunset proposal by running outside and puking in a bush.
this study room smells like vodka
the study room thinks the same about you
You claimed your dick was a divining rod, spun in a circle 3 times and walked into the bar you stopped in front of...consequently there was a bikini shoot going on
They used the ice bucket from their room to drink beer from and called it the "Holy Grail"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm willing to share. He can have sloppy seconds.
Dude he's moving to fucking Germany now. What is it about your vagina that makes men want to flee the continent?
Also I am throwing a blaZer over what I wore to bed and calling it an outfit.
I saw seagulls fucking earlier today. What have you done with your life recently?
I just watched an intern spill two trays of coffee inside a spinning door
Best exit from a building ever
Can u pick me up? Lost my keys.
Sure. FYI- you "lost" them on the roof, trying to throw them over the house.
Randomize