I dont like him- his parents were home and he hid me in his closet like anne frank
i bet jesus would rush if he went to usc
His facebook profile says he's interested in men, but i'm choosing to ignore that
Welcome to my life. currently drinking beer through two straws. easier/faster that way.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I knew his night was already over when he started marking lines on the bottle and setting goals
We thought we had lost her until we found her in the bushes a block away singing "Jingle Bells".
He's crying and calling me out on using him. It's awful. And I'm too drunk to leave.
I like yr title more along "the hot Russian I have sex with."
I don't know what he did to me, but he did it wrong. I think my pelvis is broken. I cant even drive without it hurting. What. The. Fuck.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Feel like I died but someone put me In a human microwave and I got back to life.
ANNA HAS DISCOVERED EROTIC FANFICTION OF SHARKNADO THIS IS NOT A DRILL
My manager said you offered to make out with him to ensure I keep my job if I didn't show up to work today
Seriously considering modifying my computer case so it can dispense wine. I need to make a bunch of changes and reorganize it's guts anyway....
Everyone thinks it's an okay idea now until I'm overdoing it on the vodka/clubs, dancing on a table, trying to make out with the groom.
That went from 0 to lesbian orgy much faster than expected...
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