can you pick up canola oil? she lives by wegmans
who is canola oil?
you're an idiot.
Going to spend my cab money on more shots and just take the ambulance home
Have you ever seen a 300 pound pregnant lady's boob fall out of her shirt cuz she's not wearing a bra? I have.
Most awkward thing ever: Meeting your BattleShits opponent post war.
Random question, how's your gag reflex these days
Bathrooms are cool, I think Im just gonna hang out here for a bit.
I miss eating meals at a table and having unprotected sex..
Like it was the Mama Mia of shit shows. That bad.
Tequila me may have very bluntly told him that I wanted to touch his abs.
woke up holding a soft boiled egg cup and empty bottle of rum. apparently i couldn't find a shot glass
I really like her...she always overpays me for xanax and still feels the need to fuck me to make up for it....
Ok ladies its the usual spring break system. 5 for a guy, 10 for a non-lesbian girl and double points is its a group thing. Hottest guy of the day is an additional 15. GAME ON
How do I have sand in my vagina if we were an hour away from the beach?
He was stoned laying on my bed singing I'm a little tea cup while I took a pregnancy test. Thank god it was negative.
I need a fucking roommate.
You need a fucking babysitter.
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