Haym$ered
turn off your phone and go to bed
Her mom drove me home after I blew a .13 So there I am wishing her mom a happy mother's day sitting in the passenger seat where I just banged her daughter 15 min prior
I think it might be brain cancer. Hangovers can't be this bad
Can you confirm that Victor fucked a girl for Jack in the Box tacos?
I cannot, but I know he fucked a girl for a Nerf hoop and a "Kingpin" dvd.
They walked in to the store, ripped up the phone book, and left. Can we get on their level?
he went to find a bathroom and came back 10 minutes later with a fifth of bacardi, a pack of cigarettes, and two funnel cakes. he is a man among boys.
All I can see in the pic you sent is white shorts...
Thas my pasnts in colleg! Tehy glow! AND SMELL LIKE BEER!
Cats found the secret coke stash again
They owe us $80.
I don't even know what beauty is right now. I wouldn't even pity fuck me today.
Shit dude that sort of wholesale destruction can't just be done at the drop of a hat
If it's up to me, I'll already have my pants on and walking out before he gets soft afterward.
SO EXCITED ABOUT STRING CHEESE RIGHT NOW
Hey. You dropped and smashed your road beer in my store last night. Again. And this time you didn't even order anything. You just walked in, yelled "SWEDISH STYLE!" Then lost your beer, looked depressed, and left.
My school has hired a professional rum bottle juggler for our dining hall this evening.
He’s perfect! He listens to Genesis during sex and has a VW bus!
You really are from the panhandle, aren’t you?
Randomize
