I just tipped a bartender in xanax.
why does being broke make me substitute dinner for vodka, Xanax, and two day old cupcakes? I don't like being fat, jittery and drunk.
his internet history is a lot of porn, how to make a hovercraft and side-effects of jacking off too much
Gotta love hanging with Nat. By the time guys realize she isnt going home with them, they've spent enough money and time to think I'm a good idea.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm just gonna go nail your roommate after we break up anyway.
I did shrooms last night. My drug checklist is complete, I can finally graduate.
Well at least the house will be decorated when u get evicted.
If you need anything just hit me up
Pancakes
Noted.
DOUBLE NIPPLE PIERCINGS ARE HORRIFYING
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Apparently we carried the stove upstairs. I Woke up with it in my room.
I still maintain we were not that drunk......
Dude, Dimensionally it doesn't even fit in that stairway! We might have to knock a wall out to get it back down!
Never admit to being cold at those things. That is how you end up waking up the next morning naked under animal pelts... or so I have heard.
My drug dealer is giving me a 15% veterans discount on my weed for nov 11th
That's the best thing I've heard all week.
Great, now even dream!me is a drunken borderline mess.
Told him I just wanted to be friends. He responded, "The best marriages are born from great friendships." Please come get me.
It's not even a normal fucking affair I've found myself in. It's a fucking bdsm clusterfuck.
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