Help i just walked in on mom blowing dad
At victory brunch. Have a decent story. Im now eskimo brother with the duke mens basketball teams from 2002 to 2008 and obamas right hand man
It was just a squirrel
You act like its normal to see a squirrel in the bar
I don't go on dates. I watch tv and play with dicks. dinner is a situation.
VODKA 4LOKO BEER NOT IN THE CLEAR
i draw the line when you ask for directions at a place you're already at.
Cats found the secret coke stash again
They owe us $80.
If I get over there and the april fools joke is that there's no HBO, I'm setting fire to the place.
Dude, we apparently put a washing machine drum in that back of your truck with the full intention of making a bonfire in it.
Like I feel like I use my high IQ for the wrong things
He said "just hugs" and ran away screaming.
So it may have been laced, sue me.
At Walgreens. I'm getting condoms and a bottle of water so that I'm not "just getting condoms". I don't think I'm fooling anyone though.
Will u make me a "6 month anniversary of being single" cake??? I wanna celebrate
how do you know everyone's mad at you?
I just woke up feeling shameful
dude kate found out i cheated and busted in while i was taking a shit. I was cornered, nothing i could do
so drinking tonight?
Be there in 15
Randomize
