Good face, no body. And apparently her vagina is related to chewbaca.
it was like she wanted to be a once a week night stand
i feel like when youre not in my profile picture no one knows who i am.
Well, shes famous, an alcoholic, hillarious, and has big boobs.... Pretty much my only aspirations in life.
What is the pluralization of human? I just got humen rejected, and I am going completely blank...
I didn't exactley write on my bucket list -- "hook up with a townie at a drivers intervention program"
You had already cockblocked me. The cops were just an assist.
I either just got cockblocked or saved from a lengthy court case so I'm kinda conflicted about how my night went.
when the police officer said he was gonna take a picture of the car accident, you asked if you should pose on the hood
Of course I lose my iPhone but still manage to hold on to the ruler for my dirty teacher costume
my suitemate came in my room last night and flashed me. and then she just walked away. deff transferred to the right school
you licked my face then when I finally got you to the bathroom, mid puke you said you liked the taste of my foundation.....you weren't drunk at all....
PS there is a naked boy in my bed and I just left for the bar...
I'm at work behind the bar and just washed my mouth out with rumple bc I don't have a toothbrush. This may be a new low.
Everything is scary i hate being an adult i hate responsibility tell me a dick joke
Randomize
