and before you know it i was laying next to him at 2 in the morning with penis and sadness on my breath.
Its like a 4.5 hour drive but there's drinking involved so I'm destined to go
I woke up exactly where I passed out... on top of him yet he somehow put his pants back on
I asked for a dramatic "funeral" look for my makeup. They judged me.
I'm hoping he'll tell everyone how great in bed I am. Well, how great in bathroom floor I am.
Does it count if I'm only ambidextrous while masturbating?
She licked EVERYTHING then yelled at me in Spanish. I just kept saying SI.
I just had really awesome sex bent over the side of an air hockey table. That is all. Happy thanksgiving.
1) I'm a decent drunk texter. 2) My world is spinning. 3) I'll give you a dollar and a hug for a glass of water. 4) I love you. 5) Example: your penatrive ways are overwhelming my alternative lyfestyle. 6) That is all.
7) Noodle arms: engage
The example was me just using big words while hammered. You're welcome. Ambidextrious. I spelled it right.
Hey! I need booze. And penises. And a lot of mistakes that I will regret in the morning.
It was a mess. I sat on the kitchen floor with maple whiskey and cried into a bowl of poutine. I've never even been to canada
I am one with the molecules
So you called me the queen of nudes yesterday and I'm still not sure how I feel about it
If we were teenagers we would intentionally be trying to burn down this historic landmark
he tied his pants around my leg to stop the bleeding... i think he just wanted a good excuse to take his pants off
well did it work?
it was a success in both ways.
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