If you win this game of words with friends, ill suck you off for 30 minutes. No lie.
I cant last that long. Do i get the rollover minutes?
I feel that my census will not be the first census submitted soaked in beer
Please tell me you are a size medium in men's clown onesies and that you forgot them here last night.....
I don't know, but I don't want you to think its ok to show up at my house at 4 am with a gorilla suit and a bucket of pinnapple and think id be ok with it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She said "don't make this weird" and then proceeded to sniff me.
That dude you fucked three years ago just won Jeopardy
Pretty sure the cab driver can even smell the sex coming from between my legs
You threw my heel at her from across the street... And hit her in the back of the head so hard she face planted into the street. I need more friends like you.
This is the first time I'm hearing this information.
And then he said "if you were planning on bird feeding me that's not ok"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
it was good, but also weird. like, i came four times and then cried weird.
Only time and a comprehensive case study of all of your relationships will tell.
There are no winners in a lube eating competition.
She's Jesus crazy. And one if not more other forms of crazy. She's 2.5+ crazy.
My plan to hit on all your friends went to shit after the 3rd dirty martini.
If he didn’t pick us up we would have been jerkwards eating sad pancakes at a Denny’s.
Randomize