This girl is very crazy
She's one of those compassionate ppl
So everything I said on this seemingly endless date offended her
Is showing up wearing the condom a bit presumptus
i crushed up some extenze and put them in his protein powder - should make for an interesting gym experience
picked up a girl by parallel parking. i love this town already.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She opened a beer bottle with her armpit and then gave me a cigarette from the waistband of her underwear. I dont know if I want to be her or marry her.
I'm up to 9 pic of different guys. I need 4 more boys and each one of the 13 to submit 3 additional pics. I wanna make a penis deck of cards.
DON'T LET IAN EAT HIS PEANUT BUTTER!!!
Just remembered that I poured a whole bottle of tylenol in there. It's chunky. It's deadly.
I keep telling myself that if Britney can make it through 2007, I can make it through this date.
So, were they human bite marks at least?
Your guess is as good as mine.
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So wise, so handsome, so good at oral sex.
i wore just an American flag as my costume-huge success. 20 people pledged allegiance to my ass including a senior frat boy at the keg. God bless America.
I learned a very valuable lesson tonight...don't touch a cops tazer
I did cocaine with my cab driver all night. It was the best date.
On a side note. I slept with a stuffed giraffe last night. Found it in my bed when I came home and snuggled with it. Drunk me reverted to being 2
MANIFESTATION IS REAL AND IM GETTING LAID TONIGHT
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