ur penis kinda felt like a vagina to me
FIrst one done
How did it go?
I dunno I taled about women being treated wrong and quoted Ice T. So probably a "c"
chipotle is closed for thanksgiving... I am officially thankful for NOTHING.
i distinctly remember leaping through the apartment to rescue the clam chowder burning in the kitchen
and being hungover still at 4 in the afternoon is NOT "having allergies"
She dumped a fish bowl of alcohol on herself. Just like flash dance.
It's hard to take you serious when you're crying your eyes out wearing an adult sized onesie.
Oh god our sink is a cavalcade of horrors. Brb sacrificing a goat and putting everything in the dishwasher forever
Sarah is throwing up still and I'm eating salad with my fingers
I wish I had a clear image of the dude who was sucking on my tit outside the bar last night
I fell into a police barricade, a cop helped me up and asked if I've been drinking. I just looked at him and said "dude.." He proceeded to take out his handcuffs
I boned my sugar daddy for the first time yesterday and now I know why they say guys in their 40s are the best. Also I’m getting a car.
before i went to bed i wrote myself a note that says 'i feel all swirly'
Im getting out of handcuffs then i'll give you a call
thank you for the vibrator recommendation, i've come six times today and it's only noon
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