try this...when you orgasm scream his address including city state and zip...
some kid came into the principals office and tried to explain what he was sent there for through interpretive dance.
on the way home the dog started throwing up her bone in the car..so naturally i started to puke too
And now that i don't feel so bad because you're not pregnant the $15 for the pregnancy test I bought would be appreciated
Theres just something about looking at pictures of your dick in church that doesn't feel right
I'm texting you from across the beer pong table to tell you that the drunk chick you brought over needs to disappear. like now.
My professor complimented me on the well drawn penis on my face then asked if I would like a seat closer to the garbage can.
he was too drunk to climb up my loft. i owe my beating teen pregnancy to four pieces of steel
I miss my brother. He would have fucked the fat girl for me.
I told you I would
I wouldnt do that to you. You're my actual friend
My nonexistent future grandchildren will one day ask me when I knew I'd lost control of my life. And now I know.
yeah, I'm getting gagged by the cock of fate
Drunk packed a lunch. Made two turkey sandwiches and threw in a bag of raw bacon. Gold star for the day drunk self.
He was so fat that he broke two of my ribs
Maybe it's time to stop screaming I'm a chubby chaser every time you enter a drinking establishment
I bet I give better head than any other PTA mom.
I'm with jana at walgreens picking out penis rings.... Did you know they sell vibrators at walgreens? Wtf?
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