I hate u. Im listening to lady gaga and all i can hear is boca base om om om ommmm
She looks like Robin Williams dressed as a frog.
We have had massive layoffs this year, yet the guy who cant flush his shit seems to still have a job
Is there anything medically wrong with drinking beer from a vagina?
How did the beer even get there in the first place?
That's not what's important right now
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just fell off my chair and knocked over the table. People are staring. That hungover.
You did a strip tease for the toilet.
how many past hook-ups can i invite to go bar hopping with me for my b-day before it becomes a bad idea?
Who the hell poured a whole pouch of Capri Sun down my throat last night?
I don't think you seem to understand this concept. WHEN A GAY GUY HANDS YOU A DAIQUIRI, YOU DRINK IT.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I went down on her for 35 minutes and didn't even get a handy. I've never felt more desire to be gay in my life.
I started scrolling back in our texts looking for context and a picture of your dick rose like the Great Pumpkin in the middle of my screen.
You should be glad you didn't come with last night. I watched pirate porn for the first time in my life as the 9th wheel.
and then at some point during the night I ended up holding a baby
Why was a baby at a karaoke bar, and were you wasted?
only slightly. thats not the point. it was a cute baby.
Well someone is clearly not winning the parent of the year award here
LOOK, I was 19, and I made a lot of choices with my crotch which I'm weirdly proud of
Yes dear.
Grandma's bordering on serious shit show territory at this point.
Randomize