I just am on my way home.. i had 3 and one startd crying and puking.. so they went home. one bitch fuckin ruined it for evryone.. u playin cards?
so wait, they're fucking, but it doesn't count as cheating cause they only do anal?
At CVS buying just condoms. The guy behind me is buying just hotdog buns. There was a silent moment of understanding between us.
Ya but I plan to getting arrested more towards the end of summer
He stole the megaphone off an ATM then we drove around so he could tell people not to jaywalk.
My mom just looked at me while watching the fireworks and asked if it reminded me of how I felt after sex. I'm so uncomfortable.
His hair looked like he was in a bukaki and then got a perm right after
He wanted me to strip for him. I told him that we aren't at that serious of a fuck buddy relationship yet
I'll have you know my trust issues and my daddy issues are two COMPLETELY different topics of conversation.
For future reference. Do not congratulate the bar tender at oscars she is not pregnant she has just gotten fat u will get a shot thrown in your face
all I've ever wanted was a guy with twelve cats who will tie me up in bed
He has a baby picture of himself on the night stand. I don't think this whole 'one night stand' thing is for me.
The impromptu 'dance party' was just three white dudes flailing arrhythmically in the kitchen in absolute silence. Stone cold sober.
Tell him you want to lick his face. Didn't work for me but might turn out better for you idk
You kept pointing at me and saying I'm getting chicken parmesan and no one is going to stop me
Randomize
