I just found out me and my parents buy from the same drug dealer.
you should get a family discount.
And for your info. Don't pee outside with glow sticks. People will still see you.
If I had KNOWN you and mom were coming to visit, I wouldn't have passed out in the frat. This is why I hate surprises.
So I was about the only one NOT pregaming or stoned at my aunt's funeral... Maybe thats why I'm the black sheep.
We legit stopped the the game so that Jamie and I could throw up in the bushes, and then continue to play intramurals... this is what my life is coming to1
I'm sorry, when did "I like your shit" become an acceptable pickup line?
Watching videos from last night and u go "I should be the president, I can get whatever I want w my tits"
New rule: I am no longer allowed to speak
Whoever put salsa in the kiddie pool.....your an ass. Fuck you.
It's like weed even makes my glasses better. Everything is so bright and clear and beautiful!
He showed up at my apartment drunk with a telescope wanting me to look at the "blown up star" in -24 degree weather, claiming "it's in the name if science"
Yeah I don't remember how I got home last night
Judging from my pants, I embarrassed myself smh
We met some guy at the beach, and dug a hole with him. He invited us to "come back at night and smoke a blunt in this hole"
We had sex on the playground and then walked around his neighborhood grading houses based on their Christmas decorations
I saw a picture of a baby and it reminded me to take my birth control. Priorities
I woke up on the damn lawn again...it's not even summer yet
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