And mexicans. My burrito likes you.
I feel like death. And death is wearing a fleece blanket as a dress. And is seriously contemplating wearing this to go get something to eat.
Did we use protection last night?
Um, no...keep in touch, okay?
so, are you laying bloody on campus somewhere or did you go out after class and forget to let me know?
bloody. ill be home soon.
We haven't even scratched the surface on the damage we could do. Just saying
I'm gonna go to bars and pick up women hopped up on democracy.
if Anne Taylor knew what she did in her clothes, she'd be banned from the store.
oh come on, it's the perfect length summer dress to blow a stranger in the bathroom in
I ate vegetarian today, so I deserve a beer.That's my justification.
It's like you're the voice of my soul.
We had sex twice and at Wendy's how dare you diminish that.
I told him he was like my favorite pair of jeans; I may not wear them every day, but I'll never get rid of them and they make my ass look fantastic. Needless to say he was not thrilled.
I'm sure there's been a weekend in 2014 we were sober... Clearly it wasn't fun, bc I can't recall it. Point proven, alcohol is key.
My throw up tasted like pumpkin, fall is right around the corner.
St. Patrick's day can kiss my ass. Still hungover. I guess I showed up at my gym blacked out yesterday morning. Like im not missing a gym day b
I'm going to make a stack of pancakes and fuck it. Right now.
Update: I spent 10 minutes trying to fish out a rogue vagina weight.
Randomize
