u know ur in oregon when the cop tells u to keep the beer cans he made u pour out so u can recycle them
Funny thing- my attraction to each one is inversely proportional to his level of availability.
Just wondering why in an apartment full of stoners there is half a waffle in the TRASH CAN. get ur shit together man
i woke up to my roomate hitting me in the head with a can of PBR at 8:30 in the morning...i love spring break
So at what point while he was throwing up on the girl next to him did you think "yeah, im going to hit that"
found inexpensive tickets to Norway. Questioning if its legal. PLEASE tell me you remebered the walkie talkies and face paint.
If you hear screaming in the middle of the night, bat got loose. Call poison control immediately and explain rabies
Walked in the bathroom at work and my boss was taking a shit with the stall wide open and responded "oh yeah, I forgot you never have been to prison "
I got laxative. And a toothbrush. Because who wants to buy just laxative on a Friday night?
why are there 3 differently sized panties on our kitchen counter?
JUST DENIED A NEW YEARS KISS BECAUSE HE WAS A COWBOYS FAN.
all I remember is grinding on everyone in the room regardless of gender and quoting the lion king non-stop. We need to stop buying Jameson.
He woke up from being passed out on the couch mumbled something that sounded like "Taco" then proceeded to the bathroom only to pass out again, I think we need to learn how to party like him!
My professor is wearing skinny jeans, orange socks and just said penetration. I don't know what to think
You waddled all the way home with your shoes in a construction cone. I'm glad to call you my Bestfriend.
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